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I Don’t Know My Father – My Mother Will Not Tell Me Who he Is

SAD MANMy name is chuks.  I am a 45 year old man . The only thing I know about my father is that his name is Franklin , he is from south south  and he met my mother in Lagos. My mother’s  name is Dorothy. He was involved in a business.

He apparently had some sort of a brief relationship with my mother as opposed to a one night stand because, when I was a kid, my grandparents would say with some sort of admiration, “You’re just like your father.

” They apparently liked him. I was too young to ask questions, I just accepted the fact that he wasn’t around. My grandparents have since died. My mother is still alive and refuses to share more than what I’ve mentioned above.

In March 2010, I pressed her for more answers, but she just clammed up. I asked her if she thought he was still alive, she said, “Yeah, if he hasn’t drank himself to death.” I feel like I’m the only one who has a living mother, and at age 45, still knows so little about his father. I have not talked to her since then.

I’ve never seen his face, never touched his hand, nothing… I’m now a successful man, I have a masters degree, have lived in several countries, and I’m doing very well in life in many regards. I sometimes, however, wonder how much better off I would be if I had a father who was there for me.

I have no idea what it is like to experience to love of a father. So sad not knowing where the other half of your own existence came from. has anyone passed through this situation before, please i need an experienced person to tell me how to go about it. Am fed up, What do i do?

By:Chuks

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  1. Evang. Emilia PH.

    Dear Mr Chuks, its a pity dis happened to you. But my assurance to u is dat, u are not the only one passing thru dis situation, many people are like u. I think your mother must have passed thru a terrible experience by this your estranged father, some people forgive easily and some don’t even forgive at all, you might not understand how he must have left u and her at that time, but time they say, heels wound, but i would like to suggest you put your mother in a very happy mood one day, say – celebrate for her, buy her gifts, call her some pet names and make her feel wanted by u, then later suggest to her dat assuming her husband is here with the two of you, and see her reaction, use dicey and cony way to ask her what exactly happened that they are not together. But, you can still leave a happy life with your own family, assuming he is dead, and your mother does not know his village? you will still survive, thank God you are well to do, be happy and get a good town to build your own family life, then live on! the Lord is your strength. Amen.  

  2. Nwosu Kelsey

    Such things happens. I’m a living witness who is as young as a new day. I’m also facing the same problem.

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